Sunday, April 3, 2016


April 1, 2016 12:52 a.m.

Jesus Hold Me Now

As I am sitting here in the emergency room,with my boyfriend, Todd, we have spent the last 24 hours being different.

I have to say that I felt and saw a change in him on March 15th. I can't tell what it was - I just know something was off. Now here we sit.

Blood pressure 158 over 105, putting a needle in his arm taking blood. Now the doctor, Todd looks so different. They are taking him down for some x-rays and an ultra sound - thinking gallbladder.? His uncontrollable belching are the same symptoms that I experienced when I had gallstones.

Todd has returned and we are sitting here waiting. As we wait we started talking about the PAST!

On this day April 1, 2008, I sat in a doctors office waiting to talk to a nutritionist. My oldest son Benjamin, home on leave during his tour in Iraq, and my husband at the time, Kit, were at the vet with our German Shepherd, Jasamin. She was 3 when my parents got her for Benjamin - they loved each other so. She is now 17 years old. Being that she is Benjamin's dog my husband and I felt the right thing to do was to let Benjamin make the choice of putting her to sleep. That is what the vet thought was best at her age, and failing kidneys.

Jasamin was a wonderful and amazing dog. She was so good. We all love her. It was a hard choice to make that day.

My son, Benjamin, now 28 years of age, two beautiful daughters, a wonderful kind-hearted loving wife.

Addison Grace, Evelyn Rose & Grandma (me)
Here now 2:25 a.m. we are heading home. Instructions nee a stress test, they will contact us in 72 hours. Call a specialist in regards to the polyp that was detected in his gallbladder. Its funny, yet not funny as we had discussed that just maybe it was his gallbladder. Its good to be home. Though I am still feeling something is not right.

Ok, can this day please get better?!? Now 4:40 a.m. Todd is not doing well. In the bathroom - he explains he just like spit up and was all gross, black and looked like coffee.

Laptop lets see what we can find - praying as I research for this to be nothing. We find "not what I want to see" "Bleeding Ulcer" - On the phone calling the doctor that we just saw, left message, finally those 10 minutes were long. After explaining all that he, the doctor, will consult with another doctor and get back to us. Waiting - oh how I don't like to wait.

Now, 5:00 a.m. call back from the doctor after reviewing the x-ray and ultra sound and consulting his colleage - it very well could be a Ulcer "Bleeding Ulcer".

Todd is now off to the emergency room by himself as we have no idea what was going to happen or how long -so I am home writing my blogs and doing taxes.

Call from Todd, 5:25 a.m. - they are going to admit him and going to run and I.V. with a medication and do a scope to see what they can find. He has to wait until the 'today' doctors come on shift - The doctor said that if surgery is needed it will be done today.

Heavenly Father,
I praise you Father for keeping your promise to love us, to forgive us of our sins. I come to you seeking guidance for the doctors today Lord as they look over Todd and this medical condition going on. For comfort to Todd that this will be ok and we will get through this together all 3 of us.
In Jesus Name I pray

Today has been a strain already, I know that we will get through all this, my Faith shall not be altered. Now, 4:45 p.m. Todd finally getting into a room and going down to have an Upper GI done. Finally, the wait is over.. His stomach is all scratched raw, not real sure why, medication it is, I will try essential oils for sure.

Finally at 8 p.m. home and now it is 11:01 p.m. and I am putting the finishing touches on my blogs (almost).

I spent the time in the PAST reflecting on what was going on in my life 20 years ago today, all during the process of creating a new PAST!

The Past has typically been a negative for me. I just know now that "When you believe in the Lord he forgives us of our sins of the Past and makes you new!

Thank you for stopping by.

Come join me and read some great blogs Tuesday at Ten.

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